Hoping and wishing and praying

Well things aren't going according to plan with Miss Olivia's eyes.

We went at the end of September and Mr Nayak said that her right eye wasn't doing too well and it may be worthwhile operating in November when they had planed to have another look under anaesthetic. I was OK with this as her left eye was compensating so I shouldn't have noticed a difference.

We went back mid October just to confirm whether they were going to were going to operate or not and in the couple of weeks her left eye had deteriorated and was now worse than the right eye. Cue me feeling awful as I just hadn't noticed that she might be struggling.

So we have one operation booked in for next week and the second needs to be done within a couple of weeks but there isn't any room in the lists so she needs to be shuffled in somewhere.

I'm not feeling to guilty now as it must have just been starting when we went as it is clear she is struggling. When she holds things close she goes all cross eyed bless her.

Now for the hoping, wishing and praying. I have a horrible chest cold with a cough that rattles everything it can. If O gets it then it means operations cancelled. This can not happen so come on wonderful antibodies in breast milk to fight off any nasties that may try to get her!

The added uncertainty means I now get a little longer on my maternity leave which is nice if I ignore the fact that I won't get paid :s ah well we will be fine. Well as long as they aren't cancelled!

The nursery have been just wonderful with us. I was worried that they might think I was messing them around as we keep changing the date and days she goes but the nursery manager has told me not to worry at all.

The nursery has been done up since we enrolled her and as of this week have a sensory room which will be brilliant for her, I am so happy with this nursery. It was initially are second choice but there is no way the other one would be this flexible with us.

I think all my gloom and stress lifted Monday afternoon and I relaxed Monday evening and got ill Monday night, I should maybe stress out again to get better? Although it has been lovely having two days were I haven't even got dressed hehe I only got dressed Wednesday because I felt guilty that O was stuck inside and I didn't have any chocolate in the house so I had to stock up :)

Weaning has turned into a bit of a chore, she's not keen on eating things even those that she previously liked although she guzzles the formula, typical. I am wondering if she is getting another tooth through or the one there is giving a bit of trouble. I must keep telling myself food is for fun until they are one and not stress out.

So that's all for now really. Can't think of anything else to say so better go get some fluids and watch Corrie :)